August 20, 2025

No Calm Before the Storm

Mom’s surgery is Monday and my kids go back to school tomorrow (one went back today for a half day intro to the high school- went well) and I am doing my best to celebrate 3 of my kids’ summer birthdays with all I’ve got and it’s not always landing the way I hoped as I am out of energy from doing all the sandwiched primary caregiver and advocate does while also working part-time and being the full-time summer camp counselor, tour guide, cruise director (if the cruise is my SUV or the minivan we rode in on our trip), mediator, wrangler, and personal chef of those I love the most and am also most frustrated with these days.

Burnout is an understatement, but there are the most fulfilling glimpses of what I hear that I will one day miss the most. When my efforts land well and a plan comes together and, dare I say, when someone appreciates it, the heavens open and I find it all worthwhile.

But there are many hours and even days when this is not even close to being the case and it’s challenging to say the least. Today was a day of higher than possible expectations on my part. What I imagined accomplishing was absolutely unrealistic and I ended up in tears apologizing to my kids that on their last day of summer I could not make all that we talked about happen.

The lemonade was that we all agreed to keep enjoying in the days to come, but that turned sour again when I found yet another trip to two stores to go find school supplies that I forgot to grab totally overwhelming after my son’s soccer practice and a day full of not getting to what I wanted to get to. I cried it out repeatedly today and ended up in several rants, most of which I’m not proud of, but at the same time it is also true that I want to genuinely express that motherhood, with or without the sandwiched situation,

Tomorrow the wheels on the bus will go round and round and I will have about 8 hours (with Dad helping with the buses) to get a whole lot done for work, to write clues for first day treasure hunts, and to prepare for two small family gatherings I’m fitting in before Monday’s surgery for Mom.

There will be no calm before the storm of advocating for Mom medically returns.