August 25, 2025

Lonely Waiting

Mom’s surgery is today. It’s going on now. It’s been a long day as her arrival to the big hospital was scheduled for 11:15 AM and she was prepped and ready before 1:00 PM but another procedure with another surgeon ran overtime in the OR she was to be going into. She just went into the OR just before 3:15 PM. Her surgeon and anesthesiologist seem very competent and we are hopeful! But the procedure is extensive and risky and I have been texting, calling, and posting on social media because I am on my own here, waiting, and technology allows me to receive support from friends and family from a distance

I am to receive updates approximately every 2 hours. The surgeon shared that he scheduled her this way as he is already here all night so there is no rush and the procedure could take 1 hour or 6 hours. We knew it was going to be complicated going into it.

They called the surgical waiting room about an hour and a half into her entering the operating room so that the staff member at the desk could let me know that they had just then started surgery now, but that it took anesthesia a while to place her lines (IV and some other things they discussed with us ahead of time) so it will likely be quite a while yet.

I have so much support from a distance yet I am sitting here alone just like I did right after COVID in the county where I grew up while my Dad had a quadruple bypass surgery. He is doing very well physically now about (I think) 5 years later or so. I’m an only child and most of my close friends have as many or more kids than I do and they have been working all day or caring for kids all day or both. They are running kids to activities because it’s a Monday night at the start is the school year and making dinner and some will soon start the bedtime routine for their young ones. Would be tough to ask one of them to accompany me even though I know they wish they could be here.

We have been marathoning hosting celebrations for three of our kids’ summer birthdays and hosted a celebration for a faith-based milestone for our youngest just yesterday. We have very little margin in which to plan and we didn’t know how the day would go so we agreed that Dad would get the kids off the bus like he always does and save his energy for visiting Mom tomorrow and Wednesday while I am working. And my husband worked all day and is running the kids to activities so that didn’t plan for him to be here, but now I wish he was.

Great news in the middle of writing this (an hour ago) Mom’s surgeon walked into the waiting room much sooner than I expected and shared how the procedure went better than expected and that many things we were concerned might happen did not occur and all of this is amazing news!! It took them longer to get the lines in her this time (a number of factors are making her a tough stick at the moment) than the surgery took.

And my cousin who works here came and gave me a hug a half hour ago as she headed in for her night shift. So I have much to be thankful for as I wrap up this post!

I will say though that the waiting was lonely and difficult and I will be asking and trying to arrange someone to wait with me whenever there is a next time. Once Mom is cleared by this surgeon she will pursue knee replacement surgery next. Hopefully that will not be as nerve wracking.