February 28, 2026

Checking Their Boxes

The rehab my mom went to was top notch. She has been there before, I believe 3 times, and we love the proximity to home, how beautiful the facility is, and how fantastic the staff is. We rarely have a complaint about the place. But I will say that’s it’s interesting to see what they try to do to check boxes and maybe meet third party payor requirements (I’m not sure if these things are required). It is an interesting experience to be the sandwiched advocate of my aging mom and to be called by someone who I think was a nursing student (props to them for using students to connect with the patient’s support system! Students have time!) and asked a whole list of questions with multiple choice number ratings regarding what I am and am not comfortable with in terms of aftercare at home for Mom who would be returning to live with us. I answered her questions and then she asked me to set up 5 hours of caregiver training during the day during the work week.

I have two flexible part time jobs and I did schedule the training even though I had had it at this facility and other facilities multiple times before. I ended up rescheduling the training when Mom’s discharge date was pushed back due to her not being ready for discharge and when I rescheduled it I advocated for myself as a busy working mother of 4 and the social worker reduced the training to 2 1/2 hours. He stated that it really does seem to be a challenge for family members who work to come in for 5 hours of training during the day during the week. Um, ya think?

The training was very helpful with PT and OT. Always has been. But for Mom who is not currently in need of a lot of nursing care the nurse did not show up to provide my training and 15 minutes into it we called and a nurse’s assistant went to get her which took several more minutes. She asked a few questions about my knowledge of wound care and signs of infection as Mom has a healing incision and apparently I passed, but she admitted she does not really do trainings, had just met my mom, and did not have a plan for what to share with me despite me being told that meeting with the nurse for a half hour was required. Well…two out of three “ain”t bad” I suppose.

The other thing that is a little wild in terms of them checking their boxes is that upon admission and upon discharge a nurse on a LIVE video call just pops onto the TV screen in your room. The first time my mom was admitted to this rehab (second time overall) she was not told that the person doing part of the admission was going to not only just appear on the screen but that she could see right into Mom’s room through a camera right above the bed. It gave a “Better always get dressed in the bathroom” vibe and was pretty startling. That person was upbeat and gained our confidence within a few minutes. But during this discharge a nurse who needs a public speaking class came on the screen (thankfully we were told to expect her) and the camera on us was at a super weird angle so that Mom was barely on her screen while sitting on her wheelchair by the bed and I had to stand behind the wheelchair and squat down a bit to be seen and to speak up to be heard. This nurse had her face buried in the paperwork and just read it to us as though we understood everything, barely asked for questions a couple of times without making much eye contact, mumbling very quietly throughout, and answered almost all of the questions I dared to ask with mumbled dismissive repossess about how it’s a good question for another person (PCP, PT or OT therapist, anyone but her) and gave the impression that she really did not know much about Mom’s condition or the meds she is on or her aftercare plan that she was presenting to us. But she read the sentences about crisis phone numbers, patient rights, and the substance abuse support line in hushed mumbles. I guess check those boxes we did.